When using flirting to advance a relationship, partners need to make similar assessments; too soon or too late for either party would be disastrous.Finally, as clearly evident from their views on reciprocity, flirting is like a good tennis match: it’s best when both sides play.But in complete friendships one wishes a friend well and promotes his or her well-being not merely as a means to some end, but as an end in itself.One takes an interest in the friend for whom he or she is and not for what he or she can provide. In complete friendships one takes the friend’s well-being as part of one’s own.From a conservative position, however, some of those intentions are considered out of bounds.For these men, all behaviour, including flirting, should have a clear and appropriate desired outcome.Complete friends treat one another with a respect and spontaneous affection that is mutually enriching.
They care for each other as a function of what the other can provide.Flirt with like, intentions or means in mind, like don’t just waste it.Flirt with someone you actually want to get to know."First, there are instrumental friendships of utility or pleasure.This is the highest and most rewarding form of romantic attachment: we treat our lovers as ends in themselves whose interests we regard as worth promoting as ends in themselves.
Our lovers are “other selves” in that we include their welfare in assessments of our own.
A set of necessary and sufficient conditions on flirting: First, the flirter should act with the intention to do things which are disposed to raise flirter-flirtee romance and/or sex to salience for the flirtee, in a knowing yet playful manner.