You get BOMBARDED by emails from fifty and sixty something Baby Boomers looking to trade up in the world. Yet these men keep on writing – talking about how they’re young for their age, how they’d love to have children, how they have everything in life except a good younger woman. Understand, Dale, there is nothing wrong with you being attracted to a fertile and youthful woman in her 30’s. Instead of searching through hundreds of thirtysomething women who wouldn’t give you a second look, Reverse Match shows you who IS open to dating a 56-year-old man.You double check your profile to see if there’s something you wrote that’s attracting these older men. If you’re 36, you’re pretty darned confused by these emails. By the time the kid is in high school, Dad will be 74! There’ll be fewer numbers, but at least you won’t be wasting your time. There are a lot of amazing ones out there and they are criminally underappreciated.
This is so true, and it doesn’t stop in the 30s, either.
I’ll be 42 in a couple of weeks, and in two years of online dating, I’d say about 70% of the people who write to me are fifty and over, often MUCH over.
I think the record so far is the 74-year-old who said he could have his daughter pick him up at the nursing home and bring him into the city if I were willing to meet for coffee. Your last line is telling, though, and hints at the broader trend. Unfortunately, it seems that all the men my age only want much younger women, which leaves me with the 20-somethings who think “MILF” is an appropriate subject line and write messages about being “into older women,” and the aforementioned geriatric (or borderline) set. If everyone is looking downstream, age-wise (except the few who have a “kink” for older types), where does that leave those of us who really are looking for a peer? Should I adjust my objectives to what the market has to offer?
The exact ages and differentials vary, but each one reinforces one important point: Women get less valuable as they age, while men just get to enjoy the ride.
Older men who date much younger women make the transactional, hierarchical nature of romance explicit and reveal the extent to which men and women are still playing by very different rulebooks.
You’re a successful older man who wants to date a woman significantly younger than him. Needless to say, this goes for ALL people who are dating online. We want what WE want, even if what we want is unrealistic.