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Whether initiated by a cold-shoulder, avoidance, or lack of communication... This phase activates loss, making you yearn for them and wait with bated breath for their call or text. These are the basic dance steps to this type of behavior. This formula is predictable and consistent even when your partner's reactions are not.

Just notice where you are in the cycle and don't let it disempower you.

This phase lures you into the hopes of the possibility of romance.

Contact is reciprocal, time is made to see each other, and forward movement is evident. The hot phase is designed to get you in the gate that leads to the corral, where you'll later be harnessed. Your partner begins to pull away making you long for their previous attention.

Behavioral extremes indicate a power play is being employed. Once we have the ability to see hot and cold for what it is, we're less likely to suffer its negative effects.

It's long been the rule that when dating someone whose behavior is marked by hot and cold reactivity, you're standing on shaky ground.The root cause of this behavior is a desperate attempt to gain control over the uncontrollable; love. But the partner, who's committed to playing safe, will never allow himself or herself to experience love.


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